William R Bebb

What the KECK!? William R Bebb

Vacations are always problematic, at best. Lost luggage, missed flights, long drives, and a plethora of other unforeseen annoyances await. But for passengers and crew aboard one of the Caribbean's most state of the art and opulent cruise ships things are about to get much worse. Carl Autry finally finds a woman to love; unfortunately their union brings about Zombies of the Caribbean.(The following is borrowed from a promotional pamphlet put out by the advertising agency that invited people to sail on the Haitian Princess) Ahoy, mateys, and welcome aboard the S. S. Haitian Princess! Our fun-filled ten day cruise around the Caribbean will include ports of call in The United States, Columbia, Puerto Rico, The Bahamas, and of course the mystical dark pearl island known as Haiti. The Haitian Princess is a state of the art cruise liner with a dedicated crew of several hundred highly trained professionals that only wish to make your slightest wish come true. So welcome aboard, relax and have fun! Bon Voyage!Just a few of our Featured Amenities Include: * Our World-Class Casino is open 24 hours a day. It has all the most loved exciting games of chance from around the world. (Gameplay curtailed in certain ports of call)* The Wonder Water Slide is the longest and twistiest one ever built inside a ship. It sends our valued guests of all ages speeding from the Top Sun Deck Pool through the atrium inside a transparent tube then along yet more twists turns and steep drops before SPLASHDOWN in the Lido Deck's heated pool. And there's no price or limit to the fun!* Our Captain's Table Buffet Restaurant is open 24 hours a day, and is FREE with no limit on memorable entrees prepared by the finest chefs from around the world.* For those guests seeking total relaxation and professional pampering there's Neptune's Spa. Don't forget to visit the High Energy Smoothie shop located conveniently right next to the Spa's entrance.* The Enormous Grand Atrium has a collection of specialty shoppes and stores that cater to our guests every need. Spend a magical time witnessing the rarest tropical fish you'll ever see inside our five enormous transparent aquariums: Special additions this summer include Piranha with daily live feedings, and Giant Humboldt Squids more commonly known as The Red Devils.* If High Adventure and a day spent practicing your swashbuckling skills is your idea of fun Pirate Pete's Play Place is beckoning. Open EVERYDAY from 9AM until Midnight. Professionally supervised child care is available for a nominal fee.* For our discriminating guests that appreciate the very finest in dining, live music, and dancing there's The Crow's Nest Restaurant. Dress code and reservations strictly enforced. NOT FREE!No matter what your age The Haitian Princess has something for everyone. Set sail for more than a vacation: Experience an Adventure of a lifetime. All credit cards accepted, except Discovery Card.