Barb Baltrinic

Maternal Failure Barb Baltrinic

My mother made choices which would become the secrets she carried to her grave. I had been born illegitimately, put up for adoption, but at nine months old I was taken out of the process when my mother married the man who eventually adopted me. Despite her taking me back, she was never able to bond with me. It wasn't until I had children of my own that I became brave enough to research the many questions I had about my bio-father, and trying to understand my mother's inability to love me. After her death I pursued uncovering all her secrets. This memoir follows the many dead-ends, shocking revelations, and extraordinary twists and turns I faced in my research. It was finally DNA which uncovered the biggest secrets my mother kept hidden. This book offers hope to others who seek answers about their adoption, finding bio-parents and bio-families, and using DNA testing to help solve the mystery of their beginnings. My life is now incredibly rich with the answers I have found and embraced. My search for answers helped me overcome my own feelings of frustration with my mother and her inability to love me. I now believe she did love me, but her many secrets locked her ability to build a relationship with a daughter who only wanted her love.