Saurabh Nikam

Midnight Expose - A Confession Saurabh Nikam

The 30-year-old Abhinav lives in the Amster Hill quarter and works as a clerk in Amsterdam. Onemorning, unable to control a strange impulse, he touches the earlobe of Mr. Diwan, the chairmanof his company. Shortly after this senseless act, Abhinav loses his job and slowly becomes dispirited, apathetic, anddisgusted with himself. He consequently stays in his room in the modest apartment, located inAntella, which he shares with his mother, who is attentive and affectionate to him. Forcing himself to get off his couch, the only place which gives him shelter and enables him toconverse about his condition, Abhinav wanders about in the streets of Amsterdam, sometimes tofind a job, which would be unlikely, and other times to avoid his friends and his own thoughts. After six months of not working, his only real friend invites him for lunch on Christmas day. Beholding Octave's wife's armpit, Abhinav is seized with a new sudden impulse. Tortured by theerotic fantasies this sight generates, he rushes out of his friend's house. In the evening, when he comes home, he must furthermore face his mother's suggestion of anarranged marriage with Marguerite, a seamstress who lives in the same building and whom he isquite fond of. Abhinav leaves his house and the life he has led until then and, late in the night, in apub, confesses his strange story to the reader. In one imaginary novel, Abhinav becomes almighty, capable of deciding his own destiny and thatof the people around him. He overcomes his fate and fatalism, gaining a job and money, but hispower leads him to despair and to suicide. Suddenly, he wakes up and realizes that it was all a dream; groggy with alcohol and fatigue, hehad dozed off at the bistro table.